Will you be my Galentine?

This year, get your friends together to celebrate platonic love

By ANJALI IYER — amiyer@ucdavis.edu

Having spent the last four years in relationships, I always thought of Valentine’s Day as a celebration of romantic love. I would spend the weeks leading up to the big day buying gifts, writing love letters and planning the perfect outing to commemorate the day. This year, my friends proposed we dedicate a day to celebrate our platonic love for each other — a Galentine’s Day, if you will. As this is my first year single in college, I happily obliged, though I wasn’t entirely sure of what this new holiday would entail. My friends and I spend almost every day together, so how would this be any different from our routine wine nights, In-n-Out runs and “Heated Rivalry” rewatching sessions? 

As I thought about the concept, I realised that it wasn’t so much about the things we did together but the fact that we were dedicating time to appreciate our friendships. To decide to celebrate Galentine's Day is to ask yourself: When was the last time I took a moment to be intentional in my platonic relationships? 

In romantic relationships, people expend significant emotional energy planning dates, buying flowers and doing things for the purpose of strengthening their relationship. I find that we are a lot less conscientious with our efforts toward our friendships. Granted, most people tend to have one romantic partner and multiple friends, but sometimes we can become complacent in our platonic relationships if we don’t actively take care of them.

Galentine's Day creates an opportunity to actively engage in our friendships for the sole purpose of celebrating platonic love. It reinvigorates the quotidian routines that we often fall into after years of knowing one another — a typical night of sharing a bottle of bottom-shelf wine could be turned into a cocktail party where you can all bond over how bad you are at making martinis. The point is to create an opportunity for meaningful conversations whilst engaged in an activity that contrasts your everyday routine.

The beauty of Galentine’s Day is that it can be celebrated by anybody, no matter their relationship status. Contrary to popular belief, Galentine's Day isn’t just for single people, and we should all reject the notion that it should be — after all, friends aren’t simply placeholders for an eventual romantic partner. Celebrating Galentine’s Day is a way to show your friends that they aren’t just accessories in a transitional period in your life, to be thrown away and replaced at the prospect of romantic involvement. The strongest friendships are able to withstand the inevitable challenges of life, often being your most fundamental support system. 

I would even go so far as to ask why limit Galentine’s to one day a year? It’s significantly more meaningful when a romantic partner buys you flowers just because, as opposed to receiving the obligatory (and tacky) rose bouquet on Valentine’s Day — the same goes for our friendships. One day a year seems an insufficient amount of time to dedicate to nurturing and celebrating your friends. We should be making an active effort to devise new ways to spend time with our friends throughout the year. The good news is that you can start whenever you want. So go ahead and get your friends together for a Galentine’s Day!

Written by: Anjali Iyer — amiyer@ucdavis.edu

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