Opinion

Humor: Entire congregation of local church hospitalized after string quartet plays jazz version of “Silent Night” at Christmas Eve service
HumorJanuary 17, 2020
“For Christ’s sake, stop the Goddamn music!” ***This page has been repeatedly updated to reflect new information about Sunday morning’s events as it has become available since our initial Breaking News Report*** During the Midnight Mass on Christmas Eve at St. Reagan Catholic Church 20 miles outside of Fresno, a major event of great public […]

ASUCD needs you to vote to save student jobs and services
EditorialJanuary 16, 2020
Basic Needs and Services Referendum is crucial to preserving association’s future Our basic services and student jobs are in jeopardy. That’s why students must vote on the Basic Needs and Services Referendum, which will be on the ballot in the 2020 ASUCD Winter Elections. The Editorial Board realizes that while students may be unaware of […]

Environmental costs of the holiday season
ColumnJanuary 15, 2020
Following “green holiday tips” won’t save the planet In the 2018 movie “Leave No Trace,” an Iraq War veteran with PTSD lives with his daughter in the sprawling wilderness of the massive Forest Park in Portland, Ore. They live in isolation in the dense and murky forest, but as skilled survivalists, they live in balance […]

Humor: Desperate student cites himself in MLA formatting
HumorJanuary 15, 2020
“Me, Myself and I. Personal Interview. 2019.” Fourth-year economics major Jonah Johnson was at the end of his rope last night. He had a 10-page paper due for his A History of the Paperclip class that he had put off until 9 p.m. the night before it was due. Armed with a dangerous cocktail of […]

Humor: Girl who wears farmers market hat every day confesses she’s only been once
HumorJanuary 14, 2020
The truth comes out Waking up in a cold sweat, Katie Helmer realized she couldn’t take it any longer. With graduation just around the corner, the last thing she wanted to do was leave Davis as a fraud. Four years of lies and cover-ups have haunted her during her time as an Aggie, and after […]

Cartoon: Are you ready to pay the price?
HumorJanuary 13, 2020
by MARIO RODRIGUEZ — marrod@ucdavis.edu

The future of the NFL looks dystopian
ColumnJanuary 13, 2020
The NFL will never be safe enough We’re a century into the NFL, and I’m not entirely sure if the league is the best or the worst it has ever been. Ratings are spiking in a year when it seems like the amount of injuries are the same, and bad officiating is at its most […]

Recently approved respite center in Davis crucial for addressing homelessness
EditorialJanuary 10, 2020
This first step cannot be end of city’s efforts Davis City Council took a critical first step toward serving the city’s homeless population on Dec. 17, 2019 by approving construction plans for a daytime respite center to be built on Fifth Street. The Editorial Board commends the city in making progress to solve this state-wide […]

Sarah Dessen’s Twitter meltdown sheds light on a larger issue
ColumnJanuary 10, 2020
Art should invite response, both positive and negative I’m not an avid reader of young adult literature anymore, but reading YA was a rite of passage for my friends and me, especially the YA books of Sarah Dessen. By the time we left high school, we read just about every book that Dessen had written […]

Larger systemic flaws within UC system must be addressed in new decade
EditorialJanuary 9, 2020
New UC President presents unique opportunity to shape future of system As the new decade begins, the UC has an opportunity for improvement. After careful reflection on previous shortcomings, the Editorial Board hopes that new leadership implements appropriate changes as the system enters a new era. UC President Janet Napolitano’s last day in her position […]
Humor: Introvert leaves party to “get some air,” only to never return
HumorDecember 11, 2019
This introvert has mastered the art of the Irish goodbye Last Friday, Colin Meyers, a fourth-year classics major, reluctantly accepted an invitation to a house party. After pacing outside for 15 minutes, Colin found the courage to open the door. This is your time to shine, Colin, he whispered to himself while striking a power […]
Eli Manning is no hall of famer
ColumnDecember 11, 2019
Who qualifies as a hall of famer is becoming increasingly complex in a rapidly changing NFL The NFL Hall of Fame is a tricky business. At its core, it’s a museum full of creepy busts and preserved memorabilia. But the players whose faces those busts resemble, and who get the golden jackets, are a representation […]

