Opinion

For my last column,I made a compilation of column ideas that didn’t make the cut.In other words,they weren’t good enough for their own feature-length column. A girl’s worst insult Girls are insulted by many,many things,but the insult I would like to focus on is “slut.” According to Urban Dictionary, “slut,” meansa dirty,nasty promiscuous woman that no one would even touch.

The columnist is a story of contradiction.At once he must act as the interlocutor of opined reason and customized analysis,yet by the sheer necessity for argument,he must take a stand.At times,these demands conflict; for a columnist,thus,the attainment of a perfect balance is a lasting achievement. Writing is about eloquence magnified by personal ambition.In the beginning,the columnist sees privilege.Like a child,he’s afforded space and time to write whatever he desires.He is hence impressionable,wondrous,admiring the instant subject-connection he has established.

I was determined not to write a raging cheesefest of a final column,but in the interest of bidding you fine people adieu,some failbloggage may have gone down.The least I can do is promise that you will not be exposed to any inspirational Eleanor Roosevelt quotes.Only time will tell if I‘ll look back on this column with pride or disgust.The years will age and perhaps even mature me a little,but my intuition tells me that when I‘m old and decrepit,that pervy ex-Catholic schoolgirl who grew up listening to Howard Stern over the breakfast table will continue to live on.

California State Senator Leland Yee thinks UC has a problem. The regentsare out of control, he says, and their behavior is so bad it’s time for the legislature to take over. Last week Yee and several other co-sponsors proposed a constitutional amendment that would remove the near-absolute autonomy UC has enjoyed for its entire history and instead give control to California lawmakers. While we generally support efforts to make the UC regentsand the university as a whole more accountable, this approach is foolish and should be rejected.

Tonight at6:10,the ASUCD Senate will be discussing a resolution that reprimands BloodSource,a blood-donation organization,for not allowing the queer community to donate blood.This is in addition to the recent action taken by ASUCD at last week’s budget hearings to withdraw approximately$1,000of ASUCD funding and sponsorship of BloodSource’s quarterly blood drives. The legislation that is being introduced rests on two premises:

America’s Greenest Campus competition Dear editor, Climate Culture is hosting a national competition,America’s Greenest Campus,to see which college can get the most students,staff,faculty and alumni to sign up at americasgreenestcampus.com and complete a carbon footprint byOct.5.This website is a great way to see that when each person makes a small change,together it amounts to something substantial.

Unitrans will use$90,000starting this summer to shuttle people from the center of campus to downtownin collaboration with the Davis Downtown Business Association. Due to the closure of the ASUCD Coffee House,U-DASH’s purpose is to get hungry students,facultyand staff quickly from campus to downtown for lunch.

Twenty-seven.Twenty-seven columns.Twenty-seven attempts to“change the world.“ Twenty-seven opportunities to represent the unrepresented.Twenty-seven chances to piss someone off.Twenty-seven chances to educate myself a little bit more.Twenty-seven.

This week started the same as every other.The inevitable traipse down the hall of my apartment,the soft rap on my roommate’s door and my whining voice saying, “Emilyyyyy,I haveno idea what I’m going to write for my column this week.“

When I was a wee child, I desperately wanted a Power Rangers Megazord so, I asked for one for my birthday. I often couldn’t sleep at night, imagining how happy I would be on the glorious day that transforming plastic robot of justice would finally be mine. My birthday couldn’t seem to arrive fast enough, so one day I decided to take a harmless peek in the back of my parents’ closet where I knew they always hid our presents. Finding it almost immediately and not yet wrapped, I cradled my prize like Koko the gorillamight one of her kittens.

“You don’t have enough experience.” That’s what theSacramento Bee told me when I applied for an internship last summer.One of the editors told me that while having a column was good and all,I barely did any real journalism.He told me that if I ever wanted to work at a newspaper after college,I should maybe quit the column and try reporting. Around this time,I also received a very livid piece of hate mail (I’m very fortunate to have only received a few throughout the years).You should have read the thing.It was just seething with absolute hatred.

Well,this is it.After two years of recklessly spilling my ideas,beliefs and opinions all over the Tuesday edition of The California Aggie,I now find myself desperately trying to tie them all together for what will be my final statement to the UC Davisstudent population. Some people might look at my last60or so columns and find inconsistencies,such as, “How can you support limited government intervention,and at the same time demand state and federal funding for higher education?” The answer to this question is simple,and if you really think about,probably the closest thing to a central theme you’re likely to find in any of my writing.