Humor

What’s an extra $150 anyway? DAVIS, CA — As a “journalist,” I’m often able to report on stories that have a real fake impact on the population at large. These stories have the power to inform and shape opinion, to transform the world around us. But it’s rare that a story comes along like the […]

Life became so much darker for Beefy Cowlhoun after he hit those wretched teen years If you thought that the phase of heavy eyeliner, terrible taste in music and worshipping Hot Topic was exclusive to humans, you’re wrong. Beefy Cowlhoun turned one year old this last weekend, which, as we all know, is 14 in […]

A look into avoidance tactics students use against weirdly friendly solicitors Who’s that person who just said “hi there!” to you with such enthusiasm? Is it your best friend? Is it a coworker you’re running into outside of work? No. It’s a stranger who would like you to take “just one minute of your time” […]

Treat Trump like the bigoted preacher on the quad There’s a Westboro-esque character on campus who shows up every day at the quad to preach. His sermon never changes. He tells us that we’re all going to hell. He takes out a Bible and shouts vile things. That we’re all adulterers and sinners. That our […]

How invisible people are helping prepare the tour guides of tomorrow Many tour-guide hopefuls have been practicing giving tours around campus for the past few weeks. It’s a great way for them to test out jokes and practice scripts without criticism if they bomb. The California Aggie talked to a prospective tour guide about how […]

An elaborate attempt to be trendy does not end well for Eleni Daniels It’s a moderately-known fact that UC Davis has a cadaver lab, but it’s widely known that you don’t use dead bodies to be trendy on Twitter. Third-year Eleni Daniels was not around the day that important lesson was taught, and, as a […]

hoPop-up shop finds new location Whole Foods, the popular health food store in Davis, closed its doors on Feb. 12. The store, which opened in October 2012, became a staple of the Davis community by promoting local business and alternative food options. Stocked to the ceiling with copious gluten-free and vegan options, Whole Foods became […]

This man just saved politics 2017 has been a rough political year for Americans. Donald Trump’s election has raised questions about who we are as a nation and what true American values are. It’s a difficult time, to say the least, and it’s hard not to speculate about the influence of money in politics, the […]

Children stacked on top of each other attempt to teach a class in order to fund Lego hobbies Even this late in the quarter, professors still manage to surprise us every now and then. This is especially true of mathematics professor Dr. Martin Jüsboks. After several long weeks of speculation, it was finally confirmed that […]

Students share unorthodox study techniques that are probably fine When walking through the library, one typically sees busy students toiling away at their schoolwork. But students can’t possibly be studying at all times, which is why many take breaks from their studies before, during and after their schoolwork. One such student is Michael Scarn, a […]

Building in downtown Davis withdraws inadvertent support for controversial vice president Davis’ 40-year-old Pence Gallery will be undergoing some changes in response to the results of the 2016 presidential election. The gallery — originally named after Joe Pence, a dentist — was gifted to the city by the Pence family. It offers classes, workshops and […]

Students able to complete the course with B- or higher guaranteed total omniscience DAVIS, Calif. — UC Davis’ very own general chemistry professor Tom Meineke has done it. He’s created a truly comprehensive exam. Professors always strive for thoroughness when instructing students in their field of expertise. Complete understanding has often been considered the unattainable […]