Humor

I missed you so, so much America Hello, my little American mortals. It’s me, Miss C. Rona. The virus formerly known for causing COVID-19. You used to be terrified of me, remember? It’s been a few weeks since we’ve chatted, I know. I’ve been busy, not that you care. I’ve had to make a few […]

If fabricated claims of voter fraud don’t work, a bit of the ol’ extortion might As President Donald Trump’s “voter fraud” lawsuits are summarily dismissed and laughed out of court, one thing that judges of facts-versus-fiction aren’t laughing about is the passing of beloved Jeopardy host Alex Trebek. Trebek passed away at age 80 earlier […]

May said he feels left out Late last month, it was reported that the UC system admitted 64 students due to their connections with staff or donors. The audit was only done on four UC campuses: UC Berkeley, UCLA, UC San Diego and UC Santa Barbara. It was notable, however, that Richard Blum, a UC […]

If white folks like doing it this much, it’s gotta be fun. “The best way to punish a wicked system within capitalism is to use capital––your dollar,” begins Michael Render, the hip-hop superstar better known as “Killer Mike”. “Show that systemic racism is bad for money, it’s bad for business.” I nod my head and […]

When it comes to the mental health of others, don’t be an armchair psychologist Second-year Bonnie Devlin and third-year Ayden Herman have banded together to create the Armchair Psychologists Association on campus. The association gives advice and mediates relationships for free. Together, Devlin and Herman have one and a half classes worth of psychology experience, […]

Advice columnist Amy Dickinson faces her toughest challenge yet Dear Amy: As you probably know, I’ve been writing the nationally syndicated advice column “Ask Amy” for over a decade. Every day. For over a decade. Yes, that’s right, every single day in my daily column every day, I, Amy Dickinson, respond to three people who […]

He just wanted to make someone laugh Laughter is truly the best medicine. That is why Arian Reeves became a stand-up comedian. Hearing the laughter of an audience is a magical feeling, and Reeves hoped to experience making someone laugh one day. Jumping into a breakout room for his accounting class, the lull between conversation […]

Prizes include the presidency and the future of our democracy The following is an anonymous letter believed to be written by notorious supervillain, Mr. Munch. Written on Nov. 5, the letter seems to be an attempted plan by Munch to “stop the count.” There’s been a lot of fancy politics talk recently. Election this, democracy […]

Clues to how Amy Coney Barrett might decide cases involving the Clean Water Act There has been much discussion of how new Supreme Court Justice Amy Coney Barrett’s deep Catholic faith and membership of the Charismatic Christian group “People of Praise” could affect how she might rule on cases involving abortion access and LGBT rights. […]

“I’m ready to prove all the haters wrong” “COVID-19 is only as bad as the flu!” “COVID-19 is worse than the flu!” That’s what we have been hearing for months from people comparing the flu to COVID-19. The Flu has also been paying attention to this, and it has some thoughts.  “I’m tired of all […]

There is no better clout than generosity Second-year Chris Ryan is known as “The Non-Profit Guy” around campus and this is a title that he wears with pride. He has created 11 different non-profits since he was a senior in high school. Beaming, Ryan tells me his love of founding non-profits began when his sister’s […]

If Logan Paul can get millions of views, so can Chancellor Gary May When I first opened an email from Chancellor Gary May, I vowed to never open another one again. The vague subject lines, lack of emojis and blocks of text gave me a headache. Since then, I made my mom read and summarize […]