Humor

Yeeeeeeeeehaw! “We at UC Davis support all kinds of education, and we want to allow students to follow their dreams of eating beans and dying of dysentery,” said new head of the Western Studies Department, professor Thaddius Cowboy.  It’s been a long time coming, but UC Davis finally has its first official “Cow Wrangling” major […]

The war on the rich Cryptocurrency is in the news again, as Coinbase, a cryptocurrency exchange platform, made its market debut to an $86 billion valuation—this marks a major moment for the supporters of this digital asset. While many critics like Secretary of the Treasury Janet Yellen have warned the public of cryptocurrency’s inefficiency, many […]

Coming to stores near you this holiday season BY KATE HARGES — klharges@ucdavis.edu  As I’m sure many can relate, the vaccine names Moderna, Pfizer and Johnson & Johnson have been incorporated into my family’s daily vocabulary. At this point, my dog is reacting to the word “Moderna” as if it means she’s getting another one […]

De-stress at your own peril BY ANNABEL MARSHALL — almarshall@ucdavis.edu  In—at this point—moderately-precedented times, it is important to set aside time for oneself. Many colleges advise students to guard against burnout with mental health days. As UC Davis student Allison Kwon discovered, it’s easier said than done. “I took one day off, and now I […]

Going above and beyond normalcy COVID-19 has not been great. However, it does not mean that all have suffered. Many billionaires saw their wealth increase during the pandemic and saw suffering trickle down to the rest of the population. While many restaurants struggled, DoorDash has never been more profitable. As the vaccine rollout continues and […]

How bad could it be? In a maddening choice from the UC Davis administration, the move to the authenticator app Duo has been enacted, and students have been forcibly moved, kicking and screaming, to the new education platform. Regardless of student reception, the university will continue with the move. Even with only about 10% of […]

We take you inside the explosive battle on Capitol Hill Much of the news coverage out of Capitol Hill remains largely focused on the battle over COVID-19 relief checks, the minimum wage and the confirmation of Neera Tanden. All three are equally important battles that will affect the lives of citizens on a day-to-day basis. […]

Other students in my university? It’s more likely than you think With the university planning to have in-person classes in the fall, students have been dreading the fact that they’ll once again be forced into all the horrifying social situations that come with student life.  COVID-19 has changed things, but there are some small blessings […]

The groundhog questions: How did it go so wrong? It’s Feb. 2—Groundhog Day. Punxsutawney Phil, the man, the myth, the legend and most importantly by literal definition none of those three things, is removed from his tree hole by a bunch of old white dudes in top hats. It is announced to the world that […]

I mean, if I’m not getting yeeted off my bike once a quarter, why am I paying to go here? Throughout the COVID-19 pandemic, many Davis students have been frustrated with their current education experience. Student complaints range from “Zoom creates a difficult environment to learn and stay motivated” to “I can’t say ‘My dog […]

The only difference between you and a calendar is that the calendar had a date for Valentine’s Day I’ll be honest with you. The past few weeks leading up to Valentine’s Day were emotionally harrowing. Why are there Valentine’s Day sections in literally every business enterprise? Target? Even Trader Joe’s, are you kidding? Call me […]

Technically they’re mutants, but that didn’t sound as cool As the COVID-19 pandemic continues to rage on, many mutations of the virus have developed. Last week, however, researchers that I fabricated in my brain discovered some very strange mutant variants of the coronavirus.  While observing some of the viruses under the microscope, Dr. Stanley Trask […]