Humor

If you give a mom a crepe It’s Sunday morning, and your parents want to have a nice meal with you before they leave Davis. You think, “Hmm, maybe I’ll introduce them to Crepeville. There’s something for everyone there.” But I’m going to stop you right there. If you embark down this dark and dangerous […]

Written by: ROSEY MOREARTY — rosey@morearty.org

Half-baked idea, or stroke of genius? Ha Kee Pak, president of the National Hockey League, shocked the hockey fandom this week with his announcement that the league would be changing its regulation pucks to something a little sweeter. Pak, frustrated by the tendency of traditional pucks to crack after powerful slapshots, made the executive decision […]

Written by: ROSEY MOREARTY — rosey@morearty.org

Product has been successful beyond be-leaf Ahhhh, Spring Quarter! It’s a wonderful time to get outside and witness nature at its finest. The bees are buzzing, the sun is shining and the frat boys are engaging in a game of beer die on their lawns. And, of course, there’s them. Those trees with the malodorous, […]

A love letter to the (organic) apple of my eye This is it. You and the man of your dreams are hanging out together. The lights are low, and tensions are running high. He says your name, and your breath catches in your throat. He leans in close and whispers in your ear: “Let’s go […]

An understated masterclass in acting and filmmaking, full of [adjective] Bonjour, it’s [pretentious film critic], and it’s great to be back with you, my devoted and [patronizing qualifier] readers. I’m back from the [Cannes/Sundance/Telluride/Toronto] Film Festival, where I sipped [expensive sounding name] wine excessively and screened dozens of films that you won’t actually be able […]

Written by: ROSEY MOREARTY — rosey@morearty.org

Here comes the bridle! Mazel tov! Gunrock, everyone’s favorite cobalt colt, popped the question to his longtime girlfriend, Rainbow Dash, this past weekend. Miss Dash, for those who are unfamiliar, is the star of “My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic,” a popular TV show for young children and men who live in their parents’ basements. […]

Avert your eyes, and anything else that can contract infection D. Finn Kumquat was quite successful as an avocado — f***ing hell, excuse me, I’m sorry — was quite successful as an advocate of the health food movement. He spent decades serving the local community from his private practice as a “licensed” diet, health, wellness, […]

Written by: Rosey Morearty — rosey@morearty.org