Humor

These inconveniences might surprise you! Sometimes we have days that are inconvenient. This means that the only way to cope is by choosing to release stress in a healthy way, such as talking to a friend or peer, or to release it in a better way, such as creating a listicle that chronicles said inconveniences […]

Shut the hell up, Ned Ned was feeling good today. He had the best joke ever for the bus guy. He loved the bus guy, and he loved riding the bus, and most of all he loved any opportunity he could get to show how much he knew about the 20th-century psychoanalyst Sigmund Freud. He […]

A tale of alliances and betrayal Coffee shops come and go. And while some people have personal attachments to certain cafes, the rest of the Davis population has come to accept the nature of the coffee shop industry in Davis. What does this mean? It means $7 for an espresso drink mixed with weird rules […]

UC Davis resorts to as-seen-on-TV ads to solve its age-old debacle Like a tween with a face full of acne and a million hormones doing the can-can, the arboretum’s algae holds it back from achieving true confidence. No amount of cleaning has been able to alleviate its surface flaws. However, one brave economics minor, Chad […]

We don’t host Nazis A poll published early this week revealed that “The California Aggie” is the best newspaper in all of UC Davis. Most of the competition consisted of random WordPress writers whose content was found to be vastly inferior and indicative of how our education system is failing students, even at the college […]

The Super Bowl does not tell a heart-wrenching tale of love, loss and Boston Everyone loves the Super Bowl. It’s a great time to just get together, sit with your friends (but not too close because you don’t want to give your bros the wrong impression) and turn off your brain for a solid three […]

This one’s going to leave a dent Oops, we did it again. And by “oops” I mean that somehow Davis is involved in a money-making scandal that went awry. Except this time, it’s the town of Davis and not the college — but really the two are so intertwined that it probably did have something […]

Would have been pretty sick, though This post was found on Aaron Levins’ Facebook page. I guess it’s just that I had watched “Eyes Wide Shut” last night and was doing some searching around on Facebook for any local orgies. Not my fault “Funk Night” sounds like a thinly veiled excuse for a sick, sex-crazed, […]

Action was taken after attendees couldn’t hear the drums echo in the night One of the deadliest crimes was committed at a local frat party this past weekend. The night started like any other night. “Red Nose” was playing on loop and the whole crowd was getting progressively sweatier but powering through with the magic […]

Evolution in progress “Millennials can’t communicate with anyone. They’re hard to talk to,” said some person over the age of 30, probably 40. “Although with what they’ve got between their personality and their Messiah complex, I’m not sure there’s much there, anyway.” “Older generations are so dumb. Of course we can communicate, that’s what phones […]

With just six words in a 51-second video, Gary May takes home the big trophy The Academy Awards have always had controversy around them in terms of nominations. Snubs, undeserving rewards and so on get audiences and filmmakers heated. But no one can deny that Gary May just won the Oscar for Best Actor in […]

Why won’t they leeeeeeave? Throughout the course of history, the Greeks have lost many battles. For past examples, here is a comprehensive list of triumphs the Greeks have been involved in and most likely lost — though we at The Aggie are still not entirely sure, because admittedly not all of us are completely literate. […]