Humor

My opinions have to go somewhere A good friend once told me that “the only people that I know who have a Twitter are Donald Trump, Nihilist Arby’s and you.” Though I’m flattered to be associated with such an elite group of accounts, I have to argue that my Twitter has a little more to […]

Shameful moment for the UC system was merely a moment of sheer laziness Headlines buzzed in early May when it was discovered that the UC system had been hiding $175 million in reserves, creating an uproar among UC students. However, the whole thing has since been discovered to simply be a big “whoopsie” when one […]

Administration continues to offer problem-free experience to students Universities always have the students in mind. No exceptions. Overcrowding? You won’t have to worry about that when you’re dead. Not enough spaces to study? The MU now has lots of tables that are an entire three inches off the ground. Stop complaining! Now, UCD, which stands […]

Please help me This is kind of like if Tron and Buzzfeed had a really ugly baby. Like Donald Trump Jr. ugly. Anyone who has been trapped in a computer before knows that Tron is actually not that far off in terms of depicting the computer world. Also Donald Trump Jr. is here with me. […]

It’s obvious that personal computing culture has gone too far I’m tired of PC culture. That’s right. You heard me. You see it all over the Internet. It’s everywhere, and it has been progressively infecting our society, especially the Internet. And if you ask me, it’s only going to get worse in the next couple […]

Mr. Tumnus turns out to be a philosophy TA Ever walk inside your TA’s office and get immediately washed over with a feeling of pity and disgust? You see a dirty little room with three or four sweaty students stuffed together behind their wobbly desks. Immediately upon entry, your nostrils are hit with a wave […]

Officials help students with bike-handling struggles, offer area to work on tricks As the Memorial Union games area opened up to much fanfare earlier this month, UC Davis officials decided to bring even more fun to the campus with the creation of a BMX park. Students have acknowledged their struggles in riding bicycles, and the […]

Becoming chancellor was all just a ploy to attend the sickest seminar in the biz Ever since the email came out in which future chancellor Gary May professed his love for Star Trek, students have been clamoring to learn more about their future leader. So it came as no surprise when we all found out […]

A student’s lack of distraction becomes a major distraction for classmates, world It’s always annoying when you’re really in the zone taking an exam and a phone goes off and ruins your concentration. Luckily for students in Marcus Raferty’s class, that wasn’t a problem because he’s a massive loser. “I realized after the exam was […]

Professor is either out of the loop or a hipster, irritates students endlessly The syllabi rolled out and everyone thought it was a cute joke, but alas it is true: One professor is still shamelessly using Smartsite. An eruption of courtesy laughs then turned into groans when Professor Ahdarn proceeded to give a lengthy […]

Finally, a law I can get behind After months of lobbying and protests, legislators in a recent congressional session finally voted on and passed a bill to designate weekends “for the boyz.” The bill was introduced to Congress after UC Davis fraternities decided to form a super PAC. With their monthly dues all put towards […]

Meet the student who moved to the East Coast for giving a terrible answer Speaking up in class can be really difficult. Especially when the class is in a large lecture hall with 300-plus students. In an effort to understand this problem, The Aggie sat down with some students who are trying to tackle the […]