Humor

Of the ‘big six’ romantic poets, who would your perfect romantic match be?
HumorMarch 13, 2024
Caution: the standards are low By MIAH JORDANE — mjcampos@ucdavis.edu There are a plethora of period-drama pieces within cinema, theater and literature: “Pride and Prejudice,” “Bridgerton,” “Hamilton,” “Little Women” –– the list goes on. Despite the problematic aspects of the eras these pieces take place in, there’s a fixation with romanticizing and fantasizing […]

My Safe Ride flipped the iPad around on me
HumorMarch 6, 2024
This tipping thing is getting out of hand By ALLISON KELEHER — adkeleher@ucdavis.edu The other night, I decided to study late at the Teaching and Learning Complex (TLC) for my upcoming midterms. As I was studying, the material became so unbelievably boring that I nodded off and later woke up in a pile […]

Your major decides your Peet’s order
HumorFebruary 28, 2024
Sorry, I don’t make the rules —- or the drinks By ALLISON KELEHER — adkeleher@ucdavis.edu Animal Biology: Iced milk. Geology: Coffee on the rocks (translation for non-geology majors: iced coffee). Managerial Economics: Small hot latte (only ordered for a networking event). Mechanical Engineering: Vanilla frappe (doesn’t like coffee) but washes it down with […]

Top five easy college recipes
HumorFebruary 26, 2024
Is this salt or sugar? By AUDREY ZHANG – aurzhang@ucdavis.edu I know it. You know it. We’re broke college students and, even worse, mediocre cooks. Don’t sweat it. Here are several easy recipes that even the most hopeless beginner could make. You won’t be impressing Gordon Ramsay anytime soon, but at least you […]

Season 17 of ‘RuPaul’s Drag Race’ to be filmed in Davis
HumorFebruary 13, 2024
This season’s queens will be earning their Ph.D.s in Public Servevice at the Motherversity of Yassssifornia, Slayvis By GEETIKA MAHAJAN — giamahajan@ucdavis.edu After successful runs in Canada, Mexico and the UK, the RuPaul’s Drag Race (RPDR) franchise has decided on its newest expansion venture: “Drag Race” is coming to Davis. If you’re reading […]

Which major is secretly full of vampires
HumorFebruary 9, 2024
I know what you are — say it! By AUDREY ZHANG – aurzhang@ucdavis.edu For those afraid of the creatures that stalk the night, I have composed a surefire list to figure out whether you are actually talking to Edward Cullen –– except, unlike Bella, you don’t smell good and are probably just dinner. […]

UC Davis ‘Chopped’: It’s just college students cooking in their first apartment
HumorFebruary 8, 2024
Does a fire alarm mean the food is ready? By CARMEL RAVIV — craviv@ucdavis.edu Slightly brown romaine lettuce. Crusty teriyaki sauce. Honey glazed deli ham. Milk. Everclear vodka. Even the most experienced chefs that graced the televised kitchen of “Chopped” couldn’t think of a way these miscellaneous ingredients could have blended together to […]

How to write an essay in one hour
HumorFebruary 6, 2024
AAAAAAAAAH By AUDREY ZHANG – aurzhang@ucdavis.edu We’ve all been there. You’re spending your time trying to enjoy college and get those Best Years of Your Life™ and then you remember that you’re drowning in debt for a reason — to get a degree. The deadline is tonight and you’ve got a blank page […]

Broke man spotted at the Silo Market
HumorFebruary 1, 2024
Aggies, stand on business By ALLISON KELEHER — adkeleher@ucdavis.edu I was perusing the Silo market the other day during my gap between classes, starving and needing to eat lunch before my next lecture. Usually, I hit up the pre-made sandwich and salad section to get my pathetic turkey and cheddar on a wheat […]

Gunrock yearns to be a tote girly at the FarMar
HumorJanuary 26, 2024
Somebody get Gunrock a tote and some lemonade By ALLISON KELEHER — adkeleher@ucdavis.edu Day after day… week after week… year after year, Gunrock has repped and cheered for UC Davis athletics. Gunrock, the strong and muscular stallion, is the UC Davis symbol of power and athleticism. People always say, “How do you do […]

Why we should put a cow on the city council
HumorJanuary 25, 2024
Moo By AUDREY ZHANG — aurzhang@ucdavis.edu Remember Caligula? Roman Emperor Caligula? Tried to give his horse a seat in the senate Caligula? Well, if he spent more time trying to get the horse that seat instead of faffing about in Britain, then maybe the horse could’ve told him that his senate was going […]

Guy takes Gender Studies Class for the exact reason you’re thinking of
HumorJanuary 25, 2024
Somebody get me a free tampon By ALLISON KELEHER — adkeleher@ucdavis.edu I just started my Introduction to Critical Gender Studies class and I like to sit in the middle row. As the class filled in on the first day, very few sat next to me in the front row, and one caught my […]

