Humor

Original: “The Son of Man” by René Magritte   Drawn by: Nimra Farhan –– nfarhan@ucdavis.edu Disclaimer: (This cartoon is humor and/or satire, and its content is purely fictional. The story and names of “sources” are fictionalized.)

Are you really capable of the reflection required to implement lasting, valuable changes in your life? No, you aren’t, and that’s why I did it for you    By GEETIKA MAHAJAN— giamahajan@ucdavis.edu    Let’s be honest; most peoples’ New Year’s resolutions would not pass a turnitin.com plagiarism test. Every list, every year, is the same […]

Not all heroes wear capes — sometimes they pretend to be interested in other people’s knitting projects   By AUDREY ZHANG —  aurzhang@ucdavis.edu   She’s almost done it. Her classmates watch with bated breath. The clock ticks ever closer towards 3 p.m. If she can just keep the professor talking for five more minutes, they’ll […]

Summer at the silo has a nice ring to it   By ALLISON KELEHER — adkeleher@ucdavis.edu    Not so breaking news — two months ago, in the middle of the night, many fliers were put up around the UC Davis campus offering an internship abroad for Summer 2024. There was even one found on a […]

Hubba Hubba   By CARMEL RAVIV — craviv@ucdavis.edu   Davis is often compared to Paris, mainly for how they share being the “City of Love.” Admit it, you can’t help being swept up in the romance of Davis, California and all of the eligible bachelors/bachelorettes. Even the cows are procreating for Tercero residents to see! […]

Put the pedal to the metal!   By AUDREY ZHANG — aurzhang@ucdavis.edu   UC Davis’ title as the biking capital of California is under threat. UC Berkeley recently declared plans to open a new School of Clownery to try and consolidate all their idiots into one contained place. This year marks the completion of Berkeley’s […]

All that luck is going to mess with the curve   By ALLISON KELEHER — adkeleher@ucdavis.edu   One week ago, a first-year undergraduate student was reported to the Office of Student Support and Judicial Affairs for having an unfair advantage in the CHE 2A midterm exam. The anonymous report stated, “We were only allowed to […]

I don’t check my bank account because I don’t need that toxicity   By CARMEL RAVIV — craviv@ucdavis.edu   Girl Math, a comforting concept in this money-driven, neo-capitalistic society — the idea that some purchases simply do not count. Here are some examples of Aggie Math here on the Davis Campus.   Anything you purchased […]

Seriously, get a garage   By ALLISON KELEHER — adkeleher@ucdavis.edu   If you are a resident of North Davis, or have ever lived in North Davis, you have experienced the stifling sexual tension between two Unitrans bus lines, the G and the J. For a little background, the G bus transports multitudes of students to […]

The sports teams may not participate    BY ANNABEL MARSHALL — almarshall@ucdavis.edu    The 2023 Freshman Draft, the 37th edition of the University of California, Davis’ annual draft, was held on Oct. 1, 2023, at the U Center.  In accordance with the traditional rules, the least recognizable organization receives the best odds of receiving the […]

L’Chaim, bruh   By CARMEL RAVIV — craviv@ucdavis.edu   Have you ever seen walls sweat? Smelled a B.O. cocktail of 100 people in a single basement? Stepped in a puddle of possibly beer, piss or vomit to the sound of no one getting the words right to Pepas? Then you must have been to a […]

Donations are accepted and also required   By ANNABEL MARSHALL — almarshall@ucdavis.edu    A slice of Key Lime pie was left in the refrigerator by my lovely and soon-to-be-dead housemate. It’s unclear how long, but I would estimate that it’s between four weeks and a month. It quickly became clear that no benevolent God would […]