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Davis, California

Wednesday, September 22, 2021

Column: All dressed up

We’ve all been there. You have the outfit, the shoes, but no date. So what do you do? Do you ask the guy you’ve been eyeing in your CMN [enter three digit number here] class to get coffee? Do you make a drunken fool of yourself at the bars in hopes someone will notice you? Or do you make your Facebook status say, “Jane Doe is looking for a date to formal. Any takers?”

It was spring quarter of my freshman year. I had just joined a sorority and I needed a date to my first college formal. Yes, I have been to dances before, but college just seemed bigger and better at the time. I asked my male friend if he had any potentials. He set me up with one of his dorm buddies.

I wasn’t sure what to expect. It was my first time not really knowing a guy I would be spending the whole night with. I ended up having a great time and wasn’t let down. So thanks, friend!

For some girls and guys, finding a date can be easy as pie. For others, not so much. After talking with some fine folks about being dateless, I’ve been enlightened on the issue.

One of my nearest and dearest friends, a student at UC Berkeley, shared her most recent date debacle. She met a guy and they started dating. Things seemed to be going well, and she was excited she would have a date to her sorority’s formal. Long story short, things didn’t work out. On the bright side, she was able to take the guy she had been originally pining over.

Some are lucky. They have the “automatic” date and take their significant others. Having a boyfriend or girlfriend is a definite plus when formal season comes around. And for the past two years, I couldn’t be more thankful to be part of this group because finding a date can be harder than finding shoes.

Some girls ask their boyfriends by spelling out “formal?” on a cake. Some ask them to fly from the opposite end of the state. Some write it on their boyfriend’s calendar two months in advance. Whatever your style, be grateful. He’s putting on a tie for you. (I don’t think they like wearing ties. Do they?)

For others, things don’t go exactly as planned. Someone I talked to told me she met a guy at a party. She thought things were off to a great start. That was until he rejected her when she popped the formal question. She then asked someone else, but he didn’t even have the decency to respond. (Guys, don’t do this. It’s just rude).

So what do you do when no one of the opposite sex will go with you? You take your best friend. Yes, I have learned taking a friend of the same sex (mostly for females) can decrease your chances of having a devastating evening. Not only can you share the fun of getting ready with your date, but you don’t have to worry about some guy ditching you for the hot bartender the whole night.

Then there’s the random date. The one your friend’s cousin’s roommate set you up with. You heard he was cute and could tear up the dance floor, so why not? On some occasions, this situation can work out for the best. You get a date, you dance till your feet turn blue and you’ll probably never see the guy again.

But then there’s the flip side. He can be a total ass and get the wrong idea. He may be all up in your grill and try to get a smooch or two. Just try to have fun and make the most of it.

Some just give up on the search all together. The dateless unite and become a group of four girls looking to have a good time. They may even bring their closest group of guy friends. It may be just the ticket if you’re trying to remember the college years as the best years.

Whatever lengths you take to find your formal date, just make sure to have fun. So get your dancing shoes on and your party dress, too, because this girl is ready for some fun!

ERICA BETNUN is ready for turkey and marshmallow-covered yams, so bring it on! She can be reached at elbetnun@ucdavis.edu.

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