Caleb Cheng has it all wrong – he really does.
Let’s set aside for a moment the depressing fact that he works for the department of land, air and water resources, which, for the record, means he’s probably the most biased person on campus to critique a positive column on marijuana.
That whole point about “it’s still illegal?” Bullshit. Gay marriage is still illegal, too, Mr. Cheng, but that doesn’t mean it’s immoral. Legality does not automatically equate to morality. That’s an elementary logical fallacy.
People who criticize May’s column usually have two beefs: 1) marijuana is illegal, and 2) one should not advocate drug use. I just eviscerated the first point, so I’ll move on to numero dos.
Without getting too hoity-toity up in this beezy, I’m about to call it like I see it: the U.S. is probably the only country in the world that would allow Big Pharma to legitimately classify not-getting-a-boner as a disease – erectile dysfunction – and subsequently allow them to market drugs for it (viva Viagra, brah). This results in ads being run day-in and day-out that pound insane subliminal messages in our heads (in effect, skullfucking us with cheesy pictorial puns like a dude literally pitching a tent with his wife or a studly 50-something with a flattop throwing a football through a tire swing) demanding that we run to our doctors for prescriptions of Levitra®, Cialis® or Viagra®.
Promoting drugs, Mr. Cheng, is America’s favorite pastime. And I’d venture to say that ganja is safer than 1-[4-ethoxy-3-(6,7-dihydro-1-methyl-7-oxo-3-propyl-1H-pyrazolo[4,3d]pyrimidin-5-yl) phenylsulfonyl]-4-methylpiperazine.
DAVE KARIMI
Senior, Philosophy
