68.2 F

Davis, California

Monday, April 15, 2024

Your major decides your Peet’s order

Sorry, I don’t make the rules —- or the drinks


By ALLISON KELEHER — adkeleher@ucdavis.edu


Animal Biology: Iced milk.

Geology: Coffee on the rocks (translation for non-geology majors: iced coffee).

Managerial Economics: Small hot latte (only ordered for a networking event).

Mechanical Engineering: Vanilla frappe (doesn’t like coffee) but washes it down with an energy drink for caffeine.

History: Hot cappuccino with a day-old pastry (historical).

Linguistics: Medium iced oat latte with one pump of vanilla (wordy order).

Design: Refuses to order Peet’s and opts for aesthetically pleasing coffee from downtown.

Genetics: Doesn’t order anything but finishes off a friend’s drink to get some extra DNA from the saliva.

Economics: Takes too long to order because they can’t determine which drink would give them the most utility.

Environmental science: Hot matcha latte (closest thing to drinking the environment).

Communications: Too indecisive when ordering so just gets what a friend got.

Nutrition: Small hot herbal tea. 

Microbiology: Iced matcha latte with oat milk (for the gut health, obvs).

NPB: Iced spinal fluid.

Cow: Matcha frappe, extra whipped cream.


Written by: Allison Keleher — adkeleher@ucdavis.edu

Disclaimer: (This article is humor and/or satire, and its content is purely fictional. The story and the names of “sources” are fictionalized.)


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