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Davis

Davis, California

Saturday, December 4, 2021

Hail to the chief

Back due to popular demand and an absence of Rob Olson is a column made up of assorted thoughts I’ve had over the past couple weeks.

The voter turnout for the ASUCD election was slightly higher than usual, in large part due to the vigorous efforts of Adam Thongsavat and the Elections Committee. One wonders how high voter turnout would have been if the candidates had expended the same amount of effort campaigning as candidates in previous elections.

With Barack Obama now the president elect, will we still be treated to the occasional news story about how he gets more positive media coverage than John McCain? And how will that impact those numbers?

If not for my starving college student budget, I would put money on Sarah Palin starring in a FOX sitcom in the next year. It will star her as the head of her family (obviously) and it will be called “The Mavericks. There will be a kooky Russian neighbor played by Hank Azaria whom they can see from their house when he’s not on stage. The show will be canceled after four episodes because of the time Palin will have to devote to trying to read every newspaper (at which point she’ll see this column and be spooked!).

An egg bagel and small Odwalla orange juice at the Coho is an exceedingly good and tasty deal more people should take advantage of.

I almost devoted my column last week to admonishing all those who voted yes on Proposition 8. Then I looked at the precinct specific voting results and saw that all Davis precincts voted no. Way to go, Davis!

After seeing so many TV shows where the interns end up at the wrong end of insults and pranks by the main characters, it’s a little depressing to stress so much about getting a summer internship.

If your Unitrans bus driver is on time and you get where you need to go, they deserve a thank you as you get off the bus. People who do not deserve a thank you are Unitrans bus drivers who pull away with you sprinting after the bus and don’t stop to let you on (OK, so they’re probably trying to merge and don’t see you running along side the bus, but it’s still a terrible feeling).

I disagree almost categorically with Roger Ebert’s review of Quantum of Solace. The two most recent Bond movies have been superb.

Previously when listening to Internet radio that wasn’t KDVS, I’d bust out Pandora for some tunes. Then I found out about Last.fm, which is like a tricked-out limousine to Pandora’s88 Toyota Camry.

The Hubble Space Telescope has taken the first visible light pictures of an extrasolar planet! This is so exciting! One wishes (at least this one does) that all those billions of dollars we’ve poured into failing to do much good in the Middle East were building us a spaceship instead.

Are there people addicted to plagiarism? Plagiar-holics? Do they have AA style meetings? After one person does theHi, my name is … ” speech, does the next one copy that speech?

World of Warcraft costs $20. The first expansion also costs $20. The newest one costs $40. After the first month, it costs about $15 per month to play this game. There are about 10 million subscribers to this game. So I want to know if Blizzard Entertainment is allowed to just print its own money now, or if they still have to go through the formality of collecting it.

Earth to The Fray: maybe it’s time to release a new album? Just a thought.

I sometimes have trouble coordinating the musical selections of the ARC staff with what my iPod is playing. Surely other people must have this problem as well. An example: playing Eminem’sLose Yourselfon the way to the gym (it’s important to feel pumped and badass before you play a friendly game of basketball) only to open the doors and find something by the Beatles playing. Mood. Killed.

I’ll end this column with a challenge slash opportunity (challetunity?). Compose a poem of six lines or less and send it to editor@theaggie.org. The best or most clever entry will be featured in my next column and determine the topic of that column.

Weatherman and campus celebrity Jon Gold called this column a veritable orphanage for lost weather-length witticisms. RICHARD PROCTER agreed and titled the column accordingly. Send him other weird analogies at editor@theaggie.org.

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