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Davis

Davis, California

Monday, July 26, 2021

And then I found 5 dollars

In case you guys haven’t figured it out yet, classes are over in eight days. For those of you who aren’t graduating, you still have at least one more wonderful year to experience the greatness that is Davis and absorb everything college has to offer. For those of you who are graduating, thank goodness we’re almost out of here. I mean, Davis was great and all, but I’m so tired of school right now, I can barely make myself sit through the rest of my classes.

In any case, I learned a lot here. I’m not just talking about what I got out of my classes. Although, if we’re being honest, a lot of what I spent the last four years learning and writing papers about really isn’t useful in real world situations. At least I have some interesting cocktail conversation.

But in an attempt to be my usual look-at-the-bright-side self, here are the things that I’m taking away from college that might come in handy down the line.

I’ve discovered the existence of my maternal instincts. If holding someone’s hair back and trying to comfort them while they are throwing up and drunkenly staggering down the street isn’t an indicator of some sort of motherly nature, I don’t know what is.

I’ve practiced self-control. I don’t know how I managed to get through four years without attacking anyone who sat in those lecture halls and shook the whole row of seats with their jiggling foot. Other annoying people in class who narrowly escaped my harsh verbal abuse (or perhaps a well aimed kick in the shins) include: guy who put eye-drops in and blocked the overhead, person with incredibly smelly food, guy who answered his cell phone in the middle of class and girl who wouldn’t stop raising her hand to contribute completely pointless, look-at-me comments to the discussion.

I’ve explored my creativity. I think we’ve all had those times when we are up during the wee hours of the morning before an assignment is due, and we have no idea what we are going to turn in. Either because of that stupid drinking binge you pulled the night before that seemed like a fabulous idea at the time or through no fault of your own (i.e. that freak chain of events that seemed to happen at 9 a.m. every Tuesday and Thursday morning that prevented you from getting your butt out of bed). Eventually, we’ve got do something. This is where the creativity kicks in. Ideally, throughout college your ability to b.s. becomes better and better. Or, if you’re like me, you still stay up ridiculously late trying to figure out what to write.

I’ve improved my hand-eye coordination. Methods of improvement include walking while trying to avoid bikes, driving while trying to avoid bikes, biking while trying to avoid squirrels and beer pong.

I’ve become excellent at strategizing. And by strategizing I mean stalking people who are walking to their cars in order to nab a hard to find parking spot on campus. Also, planning out what time I can procrastinate until while still turning in my assignments on time and fairly well done.

I’ve become much more patient. You get a lot of practice waiting when your favorite restaurant is Sophia’s Thai Kitchen. Have you ever tried to eat there on a Friday or Saturday night? Another prime waiting opportunity: when you’re determined to get your free printing out of the computer labs on campus. Ten minutes before or after class, those lines get ridiculous.

I’ve gained a larger vocabulary. And that’s just counting the MyUCDavis word of the day and playing scrabble on Facebook. I didn’t even factor in all those books I skimmed for class.

DANIELLE RAMIREZ wants to know what you’ve learned while in Davis, but not in class. To brag about your college escapades, e-mail her at dramirez@ucdavis.edu.

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