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Davis, California

Monday, October 18, 2021

Davis students conspire to take most expensive classes

“This costs how much?”

According to UC Davis’ Schedule Builder website, “course material and service fees have been waived for the Winter 2021 Quarter and will not be charged (except for some professional schools program fees).”

As such, UC Davis students have collaborated to take the most expensive classes they can before the university realizes what they’ve done.

Roxy Harshe, a third-year mathematics major, decided to mix it up next quarter and take: GEL 038A: Intro to Gold-Smelting.

“I try not to mess up, but my instructor tells me accidents happen,” explained Harshe, “which is reassuring.” 

Joel Li is a first-year cognitive science major. “It was a hard choice, but I think I’ll have to go with HIS108: Fabergé Egg Breaking,” he answered.

Li said this pairs very well with other classes in his schedule, including: Fabergé Egg Making, Fabergé Egg Taking and first year seminar: What are Fabergé Eggs, and why must we break them?

Even university faculty are taking advantage of the new change. Rumor has it Anujit Chakraborty, an economics professor, is running a new research topics class this winter––ECN 190: What Happens When We Invest in Bad Stocks?

“It’s exciting work because no one really knows what happens,” explained Chakraborty. “But we’re gonna find out.”

Throughout all interviews conducted, students and faculty all reaffirmed an important point: “Make sure to have fun,” insisted Harshe. “You can’t put a price on happiness.”

Written by: Matthew Simons — mrsimons@ucdavis.edu 

(This article is humor and/or satire, and it’s content is purely fictional. The story and or names of “sources” are fictionalized.)

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