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Davis

Davis, California

Wednesday, March 12, 2025

Humor

The ghost of Unitrans past

The buses are so wise   By ALLISON KELEHER — adkeleher@ucdavis.edu   After a long and grueling day on the UC Davis campus, with the sun having set...

Your guide to figuring out that one classmate that just won’t stop staring

Do they hate you? Love you? A secret third thing?   By MADISON SEEMAN — meseeeman@ucdavis.edu   Nearly 30 minutes into my three-hour-long computer lab, I felt a...

The eggheads have been infected by the bird flu

How will this impact my daily omelet?   By ALLISON KELEHER — adkeleher@ucdavis.edu   Late one night, I left the library around closing time (since I am a...

Gunrock spotted sulking after fumbling a stallion

It’s rough out here   By ALLISON KELEHER — adkeleher@ucdavis.edu   The other day, I was taking a stroll through the Memorial Union (MU) Quad when I looked...

The A and the Z bus lines finally get together

They will live happily ever after   By ALLISON KELEHER — adkeleher@ucdavis.edu   Once upon a time, in a land far, far away called Davis, California, two bright...

Hear me out: Valentine’s Day should be medieval

A heart that bows to no one but my love   By NEVAEH KARRAKER— nakarraker@ucdavis.edu   To all those weary of modern dating,   We, the hopeless romantics, pronounce that...

I don’t understand the slang anymore

What is ‘the huzz?’ I’m too old for this   By MADISON SEEMAN — meseeman@ucdavis.edu There comes a time in everyone’s life when they must realize their...

My take on modern self-care

With these tips, who needs to touch grass?    By MADISON SEEMAN — meseeman@ucdavis.edu   We live in rough times. Between today’s news, yesterday’s news, tomorrow's news and...

Swarms of gym bros overwhelm Peet’s baristas with their protein demand

Please consider enlisting as a barista to help     By ALLISON KELEHER — adkeleher@ucdavis.edu   In the wake of the protein menu release, there has been an unforeseeable...

I’m sober and I’m confused

Do you all actually like alcohol or is it all an elaborate ruse?   By MADISON SEEMAN— meseeman@ucdavis.edu   LED lights, red solo cups and the worst acoustics...

BOOM or DOOM: UC Davis edition

The Rizzler (me) has spoken   By ALLISON KELEHER — adkeleher@ucdavis.edu   UC Davis is a well-known institution with many bright students and faculty who support the advancement...

Stay away from the bagel

Student drives himself insane over Memorial Union pizza bagel   By ALLISON KELEHER — adkeleher@ucdavis.edu   My poor friend, Dwayne, a geology major, took some much-needed respite from...

I’ve got a tip for you: don’t

UC Davis student bravely speaks out against American tipping culture   By Tara Romero — tcrome@ucdavis.edu   If you’re tired of the barista flipping their iPad around with...

They don’t know Snoopy like I do

Do social media users wearing his profile picture really know his heart?   By MADISON SEEMAN— meseeman@ucdavis.edu   Snoopy is everywhere. He’s on the face of chocolate bars,...

It’s time to start making enemies

Studies indicate that having an enemy is actually good for you   By MADISON SEEMAN— meseeman@ucdavis.edu   As children, we’re often discouraged from using the word “hate.” It’s...