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Friday, December 5, 2025
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Humor

Humor

Stay away from the bagel

Student drives himself insane over Memorial Union pizza bagel   By ALLISON KELEHER — adkeleher@ucdavis.edu   My poor friend, Dwayne, a geology major, took some much-needed respite from...
Humor

I’ve got a tip for you: don’t

UC Davis student bravely speaks out against American tipping culture   By Tara Romero — tcrome@ucdavis.edu   If you’re tired of the barista flipping their iPad around with...
Humor

They don’t know Snoopy like I do

Do social media users wearing his profile picture really know his heart?   By MADISON SEEMAN— meseeman@ucdavis.edu   Snoopy is everywhere. He’s on the face of chocolate bars,...
Humor

It’s time to start making enemies

Studies indicate that having an enemy is actually good for you   By MADISON SEEMAN— meseeman@ucdavis.edu   As children, we’re often discouraged from using the word “hate.” It’s...
Humor

Soup fixes everything

Researchers visiting UC Davis are unsatisfied with their catering options   By ALLISON KELEHER — adkeleher@ucdavis.edu   Recently, the Department of Agricultural and Resource Economics (ARE) hosted three...
Humor

Petition to remove turkey from the Thanksgiving menu

Why would you want to eat something so sexy?    By ALLISON KELEHER — adkeleher@ucdavis.edu   To whom it may concern:   I don’t know about you, but I am...
Humor

The M and the W broke up again

They’ll get back together in a week   By ALLISON KELEHER — adkeleher@ucdavis.edu   Just when I thought the Unitrans bus lines were in harmony again, there appears...
Humor

There’s something lurking in the Craft Center

Next time you go to the Craft Center, make sure you say hi   By ALLISON KELEHER — adkeleher@ucdavis.edu   The other day, I went to the ceramics...
Humor

Self-obsessed professor focuses more on himself than teaching

He knows what he likes   By ALLISON KELEHER — adkeleher@ucdavis.edu   I’ve spent the entirety of this quarter trying to figure out my professor. On the first...
Humor

Big dust ensures that the TLC is never cleaned

I’m coughing just thinking about it   By ALLISON KELEHER — adkeleher@ucdavis.edu   Me and all of my faithful readers can agree on one thing: The Teaching and...
Humor

Demon King picked the wrong day for world domination

An interview with the devil   By AUDREY ZHANG – aurzhang@ucdavis.edu   A hundred voices cried out in agony. Ash blackened the sky. Sulfur steam burned animals alive...
Humor

Campus Tours is locking students into cages for the enjoyment of prospective Aggies

Can I have a bathroom break please?   By ALLISON KELEHER — adkeleher@ucdavis.edu   I’m really popular, so I have a lot of friends roaming around campus. Specifically,...
Humor

My roommate is buggin’

Where’s my fly swatter?   By ALLISON KELEHER — adkeleher@ucdavis.edu   Late last night, I was tossing and turning in bed, wishing I could fall asleep. I drank...
Humor

Seniors disappointed at lack of freshmen accidents

Is this wheelie happening?!   By AUDREY ZHANG – aurzhang@ucdavis.edu   What used to be a beloved pastime is now in danger of dying out. Seniors armed with...
Humor

Inflation has left the squirrel community in shambles

Please contribute to their GoFundMe   By ALLISON KELEHER — adkeleher@ucdavis.edu   Lately, the economic and political state of the world has been bleak to say the least....
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